If you will soon be in a flatshare or house share, decide before you move in just how friendly you would like to be and have an honest discussion about becoming a friend to your new flatmate. However, don’t feel that you need to decide right away if you want to become best friends, or not friends, with someone. As long as you both can remain polite and respectful then friendship can run its natural course.

Becoming Friends with a Flatmate

When flatmates start out without a history it can be easier to set house rules and be honest about what each likes or dislikes as there is no real worry about offending anyone or having ancient history brought to the fore. In essence, starting out with a new flatmate is like starting out with a clean slate. In fact, it may be weeks or even months before new flatmates have a meal together or spend an evening watching a DVD. For some flatmates, this may never happen and for some it may happen almost immediately. As long as neither flatmate feels that they must spend time with the other, or enjoy the same things as the other, then any friendship that does develop can be viewed as a nice perk of the living arrangement.

Flatmates and Mutual Friends

Some flatmates may find that they have mutual friends. When this occurs it can be easy for a flatmate to want to question the mutual friend to find out all that (s)he can about the other. However, questioning others can lead directly to gossip so both flatmates should try to avoid any “investigations”. Instead, asking a flatmate directly about something is the best course of action. Not only does this help maintain good communication between flatmates but it also allows the other flatmate to answer – or not answer – as (s)he sees fit.

More than Friendship with a Flatmate

Some flatmates may find that they get along so well with a flatmate that their friendship is in danger of turning into something more. As a general rule of thumb romantic entanglements should be avoided between flatmates as it can be hard to go from living with a flatmate to living with a romantic partner almost immediately.
Flatmates should set rules about respect early and allow friendships to develop naturally..

Sourced from www.sharingaccommodation.co.uk